Meatier (or is it meta-ier) thoughts re 5.11

[ash48]

So, in between trying to get my damn Sam vid sorted out and watching the latest episode, I've been doing some pondering...


Acknowledgment vs denial

Initially I was going to blather in about whether Dr. Cartwright was partially real or entirely imagined. Personally I like the idea that she was entirely imagined, but when putting forth an argument for that I found there really isn't a lot to go on. I think I just like the idea that Dean was psychoanalysing himself from the get go. He seemed to be acknowledging how screwed up his life is.. no sleep, lots of drinking, no long term relationships, daddy issues still present and then later on the biggie - having to save everybody and the weight (still) on his shoulders.

I also thought there might have been some weight behind the argument because no other characters interact with her and she has an uncanny resemblance to demons from the past (namely new Meg and the Crossroads demon) - and thus something Dean may well "conjure" up as his own personal demon.



But I think I might be grasping at straws. It seems more plausible that she was real and then became imagined. I don't think Show gives us any strong evidence for either case.

So I've decided instead to blather about character development and whether the boys are simply denying their issues or acknowledging them and thus taking some steps forward.

See, I think this episode was about Dean making some more steps toward maturing. I believe Kripke set out to make it one of the themes this season and here we have Dean acknowledging everything that is screwy about his life and discovering that for him to survive all this he needs to repress it. Now this could be seen as troublesome. Denial is not a solution. But I don't see this as denial. I see this as acknowledging.. "Yep, this is all the crap I carry around" and the way he deals: "I know it's there and either it drives me crazy or I put it away and more on".

Also, I love this:

Dr. Cartwright: (and imaginary at this stage I believe) "How do you get up in the morning?"
Dean: "Good question".

Damn good question. I've been asking the same thing since he returned from hell because I still struggle with the notion of anyone surviving 30 years of torture. (Yes, yes I know. Fictitious character, but the show does like to ground itself in reality even when dealing in the realms of the completely "unreal").

The fact that it's been addressed is what I like about it. So if it's Dean asking himself all these questions then it works as a way of voicing his "crap" out loud and acknowledging the way he deals with it. Which of course becomes important at the end when he has his talk with Sam.

Now Sam. Giant Sam. Sam has made some acknowledgments too. He's (I think finally!) acknowledged some anger issues and, for me, saying it out loud is a step closer to maybe coming to terms with it. (yes, yes very anvilious but would not be Show if it wasn't the case..).

So at the end I don't believe Dean was shutting Sam down, or not listening to him. He was giving him some big brother advice. "This is how it works for me, maybe it will work for you". Because what other option do they have?! Really? Sit and discuss it for hours? Weep? Throw things around? Hug? (well yes, hugging would work wonders.. please...) No. They need to acknowledge their issues for what they are, put them some place else (for the moment) and MOVE ON. They have the world to save after all.

So for me they have both moved forward some more. Sure, they have a long way to go and if anything had been resolved at the end of that episode what the hell would they do to ramp up the angst for the rest of the season?

I mentioned elsewhere that I would love to see the issue of Sam's anger turned on its head later on. If Lucifer is so desperate for Sam to be carrying all that anger around inside him maybe if he somehow resolves his anger (and instead discovers an inner peace *don't laugh!*) Lu won't be successful in possessing Sam. If it ever comes to that. Which I hope it doesn't I have to say.

Actually from my previous post the lovely ancastar suggested that it would be great to see this season finish with the smiting of Satan etc. and season 6 would be a season of healing. That works for me because in some ways it would be like one big epilogue. Five years of angst build up and one year where they can in fact start to feel their worth, do the weeping and hugging (yeah, right) to heal their psyches and keep on saving people and hunting things. Things that are not as evil and as soul destroying as demons and the devil for god's sake.

Any finally. The issue of Sam growing up comes to the fore again. Recently he asked Dean to "let him grow up". Well Sammy, it's time to now grow up. Stop blaming all and sundry for your woes and face your responsibilities, past decisions and actions. That's not to say everything has been your fault, not by a long shot, but it's happened and it's time to deal. And by acknowledging his anger issues out loud I think he might have just taken a step in the right direction.

And the boys are still together at the end. Stronger? Maybe. (If Sam's telling the truth that is....)

Dean: "Are you with me?"
Sam: "I'm with you".

And now for some pictures because pictures are nice (though excuse the crappy quality of these...)



First up: Giant Sam... it's not my imagination I'm sure of it:


I thought it might have been the side burns, or his newly cleaned and quaffed hair... but I think he's just HUGE!

A little reminder of where our boy started....



He's got sideburns there as well .....

Also, bondage Sam. I do like my Sammy all tied up... Just had to make comparisons to recent tied positions, 'cause they seem to like him tied like this. Not that I'm complaining... *g*





And of course these are usually followed up by hero Dean rushing in to save him. Which I'm sure doesn't help Sam with his growing up issues, but hey. I do love Dean all protective like.. Especially when accompanied by lines like "Get away from him"... But I am immature like that.. *g*

Thanks for indulging me. No idea why I've taken to blabbing lately. It's kinda fun I think. :)

Comments

[redteekal.livejournal.com]

You know I kept thinking the same all through this episode about the Dr Cartwright - that she looked very similar to previous brunette demons in Dean's life in particular the current Meg meat suit.

And I find myself completely sympathetic with Dean's POV on how to deal with the crap they have to face everyday - he *knows* it's there, he's not in denial about its existence he just chooses (in the interests of you know, saving the world and stopping the Apocalypse) to shove it all into a rather rapidly expanding box in his mind for possible future scrutinisation at a later point - for example for when Sam and him ever become Grumpy Old Men.

And oh yes - look Sam's tied up again - doesn't seem to matter how many times show does this to him I NEVER get tired of seeing it - quite the opposite actually ;)Yes yes, I am as shallow as a rain puddle on a Perth Summer's day.

I understood Dean's reaction speech to Sam when they were standing by the Impala - didn't necessarily like it but I understood it. It was really the only choice of words that would get Sam moving again. But I really wanted to hear (and had they been in less pressured circumstances I hope this would have been the approach) Dean tell Sam that his anger is as much a part of him as his floppy hair, sasquatch height and his fastidiousness about his food/research/etc and he needs to start regarding it as his own weapon - it's certainly been part of his survival instinct and also has lead to him saving Dean's ass on a number of occasions. He shouldn't deny it, repress it or get morose and depressed over it - he needs to use it to his best advantage and maybe get a handle on it when it gets away from him on occasions.

Look at me hijacking your post for my own rambly thoughts! Sorry bout that!
I seem to have no filter whatsoever when it comes to the boys. They just give us so much material to work with!

[ash48.livejournal.com]

Hey,

First up, don't ever apologise for so called "hijacking" - that's what it's all about. I love hearing other people's thoughts. Even if (and sometime especially if) they are things I hadn't considered...

And the idea of the boys becoming Grumpy Old Men warms my heart. Means they have survived!!

Yes yes, I am as shallow as a rain puddle on a Perth Summer's day.

Oh I love this. (bit like yesterday's 2 second burst!)

Now I love what you said Dean could have said to Sam. I've been really struggling to think what he could have said that would have helped. But this is very insightful, though I suspect too insightful for Dean at the moment ... I agree that repressing it isn't going to help in the long term, but I see this as a "quick fix". And in some ways I would like to see Sam acknowledge those things for himself. Understand that his anger is part of him. No doubt it terrifies him though, especially when he's seen what he can do with it. But Sam is still quite reliant on Dean. Which I don't think is necessarily a bad thing. They do "even" each other out.

Personally I would love to see him lose his anger and bitterness, but as you say it's been necessary on many occasions to help them survive.

Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. :D :D