ash48: (ma brother)
[personal profile] ash48
DAMN! I just have to unload a bit and then I might feel better. I've noticed peeps doing it through vid and fics and art and meta and there's been some amazing stuff. I will vid it out at some point, but in the meantime a few things re

On second watch I tried to be objective, take a step back, look at the way it was shot, the acting, the amount of blood on Dean's face, anything that kept me from bawling again. It was working pretty well until I discovered the moment, the line that makes this all so sad for me...

"Every part of him, every fiber he's got
Wants to die
Or find a way to bring Sam back.
But he isn't gonna do either.
Because he made a promise


WHAAAAAAA! He isn't gonna do either!!?!!! I just. I can't. I just can't reconcile that. I can't reconcile Dean chowing down on dinner knowing... KNOWING, what Sam is going through. I know he needs comfort and I get that and I have no issue with it being Lisa or anything. I just. *sobs* It's Sam! DO something!

Also... that piece of music has been used before. I'm pretty sure of it. In another really sad episode. So damn that piece of music for making it worse. I haven't gone searching, but I'm sure it's been used before.. (?)

And something else. Kripke said good-bye. To us. It was weird to me the first time around but this time I listened to Kripke rather than Chuck and it got me thinking that this is, of course his swan song and after 5 years he said goodbye.

Endings are hard
Any chapped-ass monkey with a keyboard, can poop out a beginning, but endings are impossible.
You try to tie up every loose end, but you never can.
The fans are always gonna bitch.
There's always gonna be holes.
And since it's the ending, it's all supposed to add up to something.
I'm telling you, they're a raging pain in the ass.


Hee! Thanks man. We love you too. :) I wonder if he had any idea how passionate his fans would be when all this started. How easy it was to start this show, but with so many loyal and passionate pains in his ass fans, by the end he just felt more pressure to get it right. But knew he couldn't. There's too many of us to please. No wonder he left us in tears. (And I know he's probably still gonna hang around but he's let go of the reigns).

Personally I have a lot to thank him for. I won't list them all. It's basically everything that fandom brings. From learning how to vid to chatting with people from across the globe. People I consider friends. Wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him. So, THANK YOU sir.

Then's there's this:



I can't think that this (arms stretched out) is a coincidence when we've had quite a few shots of Sam like this:



I wondered if they'd tie those up (there were a few others with Sam in this position; Dream a Little Dream and Jump the Shark to name a couple). They did. I love it when they do that. I do adore you Show. But FU for making me hurt so hard.



Lastly. I do actually want to "vid it out". I have an idea but I'm trying to come up with the quintessential Supernatural song. I know "Carry On My Wayward Son" is probably the one... but other than that? ACDC? Led Zep? Metallica?? *eep*

*phew* I do feel better now. :)

Oooh and also! Got my new MacBook Pro today! Shiny, shiny new laptop! \o\ /o/

Date: 2010-05-18 11:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ash48.livejournal.com
Oh yes. Yes. I mean, if Dean knew that Sam was dead and in heaven then I could understand him moving on. Getting a life. Sam's in heaven, with Ash and Ellen and Jo and the gang and it would be OK for Dean to have his apple pie life. But Dean has been there. He even said he would be worse for Sam down there. I just don't GET THAT.

And good call on poor Lisa and Ben. What kind of happiness could they have? Even if Dean made the decision to move on (as it appears) he wouldn't be a happy soul to live with.

And hun. I can't even start on Sam outside! The look he gives is so hard to read. It could be "so you really are happy now I'm gone"... ack.. I don't even know why I went there, but second time around I got the sense of that.

Re song. Actually I have this super depressing song that was going to be my next vid... but I just can't vid it at the moment. *guh* so sad. So I'm thinking more of a Kripke homage. No sure yet. I just have too many I want to do. NOW!

*hugs* hun. We'll survive it all in the end.. :D

Date: 2010-05-18 11:10 am (UTC)
ext_37245: (Default)
From: [identity profile] el1ie.livejournal.com
I know, it's worse and worse the longer you think about it. I have to think it's only a couple of days, Sam will go and let Dean know he's out and ok and they'll agree on some time apart - that's about the only thing that keeps me going.

I haven't been able to watch it again yet... sounds as though I should thought as I honestly hadn't thought about that look from Sam meaning that - **ouch**

Song - um...show has used my all time favourite Free track - All Right Now, love that song to death, might work for you? From the Impala's pov? *G* Ok, now I'm being silly...

Date: 2010-05-18 11:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ash48.livejournal.com
From the Impala's pov? *G* Ok, now I'm being silly...

Oh no. No. I've been wanting to do an Impala POV vid FOR AGES! I'll check out the song.

Though for this idea it's more about ensemble. (though I hate having and idea and no song. Never works out for some reason... *sigh*)

But looking at their lives from the Impala's POV is so totally on my list of things I want to vid. :)

I have to think it's only a couple of days,

Oh god. I hope it's only a couple of days. I haven't begun to contemplate how much time has passed. I just thought it was a short while.. but really? Probably not. Ok. Not thinking about it. *lalalala*

xx

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