6.05 Episode reaction.

[ash48]

After I watched that episode I wanted nothing more than to scream and rant and cry and just....just... PUNCH something. Then I remembered it's a TV show and it's fiction and it's not worth the emotion I invest in it.

Then I remember it's a TV show that I am emotionally invested in and it has ripped my heart out so many times that I should be used to it by now. I should expect it. It should be water off a duck's back.

But it's not.

THAT WAS THE GOD DAMN SADDEST AND MOST DISTRESSING EPISODE FOR ME TO DATE! Well, next to Swan Song maybe. But at least in Swan Song THEY WERE THERE FOR EACH OTHER. They were HEROIC. There was LOVE. There was PASSION.

Sam standing by watching and smirking as Dean got turned was THE most painful moment ever. Even when they are fighting each other there is at least EMOTION and LOVE.

I get it. I do. Something Is Wrong With Sam. There is ALWAYS something wrong with Sam. It's obviously the "mystery" this season. What Is Wrong With Sam... but why does it (again!) have to be Sam hurting and alienating Dean???!! Why do they keep doing that?! I don't even have an issue with something always being wrong with Sam. When he first started having "visions" that was cool. Something was changing and the pay off was big. When he turned to Ruby in S4 it hurt sure, but there was a damn good reason for it.

But this. It's hurts so much more because by taking away Sam's empathy it means the connection between the boys is completely lost. That connection is what I tune in for. Them fighting their battles together, working out each others' issues, a beer, a smile, a chat. Teamwork.

But it's gone and if they don't fix it pretty damn quick I might... I want to say quit you, but I'm not sure if I could actually do that... but it's what I would like to do. The heartbreak is getting to be too much. And yes, I know it's a TV show, but what's the point of turning into something for entertainment when it just keeps squashing all the reasons why you tuned in in the first place.

I hate the way they are playing with us. Deliberately having them be at odds with each other MORE THAN THEY HAVE EVER DONE BEFORE. This was supposed to be the season that was going back to the way it was. Wasn't it? And even though I don't expect, or really even want a repeat of season 1 or 2, I want things to be BETTER between them. So much better.

I actually wonder if this is the Sam we were meant to get in Season 3. Remember all that "did Sam come back from the dead wrong?" Are you sure's is 100% Sam?" etc. That never really played out during that season save a couple of mentions. I think we are getting that Sam now. Friggin' 2 seasons later. Thanks for that.

So. All I can say is the pay off better be HUGE! I can go with Sam not having a soul. I even think he might have traded it to get free, or even made some sort of "deal". He's obviously on a mission to do with these alpha monsters and maybe he had to complete this "mission" in order to get his soul back.

He better get it back pretty damn quick! And. I want A BIG DAMN HUG FEST REUNION WHEN THE REAL SAM RETURNS!!! I want weeping for christ's sake!! And hugging. Like REAL hugging. Did I mention the hugging.... and weeping?

Moving on: There were some things I did actually like. Though my viewing was completely skewed by my worry of non caring, emotionally void, manipulative, soulless LOST Sam.

Counting the ways....

1. Bela Lugosi's Dead!! For the Win!! (Hubby would totally approve too!) Great song choice.

2. Twilight shout outs did make me chuckle. I admit it. And I like that they used the romanticism that Twilight has created of vampires as a way of luring in people. (not so impressed that they had to only be young attractive women. Bothered me a tad).

3. Dean's phone call to Lisa. It's been really nice to see him happy and that call conjured up moments of them cuddling up together. Loved the "coming home". It really felt like Dean had a place to go. A place he was still loved. (Shame that was completely and utterly shattered). I really hoped we'd have a not so angsty Dean so he could take on the problem with Sam more clearly. Not so... um... (oooh, don't hate me)... self pitying.

4. Dean thanking Lisa. Really bought home how much she really did do for him.

5. As much as I hate what they're doing with Sam I like that we have been given real confirmation that Sam is WRONG! Having Samuel's POV on this was the ultimate confirmation. And I love the way Jared is playing this Sam. The way he's delivering the "I'm supposed to say this now" lines like "Dean, are you ok?". Listen to that. It was brilliant I reckon. Damn you Padalecki for playing robot!Sam so well!

6. I liked Samuel. I like that we really don't know what's going on with him but he seemed to really care about curing Dean and he was truly surprised to find out that Sam was using him to get intel on the alphas (OH SAM!!!!)

7. Fake vampire guy. <3

8. Dean. Aside from him being ridiculously hot, I felt like he was really trying to make something of what he was given this week. Script = not the best. That dreadfully long scene in the vampire's nest (where the cells were) was ....um....boring to me. Jensen always brings such a great energy to what he's given. At times I felt he was a little "tired" and maybe that was Dean just being damn tired of being in peril again. I went into this ep being concerned for another Dean centric episode. It was but, idk... I ended up being ok with it. Jensen sold it to me more than I expected. And Dean being leered upon by that vamp was ... UNF... vulnerable Dean just does things to me. :)

9. Dean's dreams. LOVED!! (And all I could think was I hope to be able to use that in a vid one day). In fact, that might just have been my favourite thing in this ep. Adored the editing and visuals of those. Show looked pretty good overall. Some of that red and green colouring appeared again. Representing the boys' conflict maybe?

10. Ummm.... er.... *to be filled in by anyone who has something else* *g*

Also...

Not sure why, but Samuel's line about Dean... "maybe he has some Campbell in him after all" REALLY irked me. What?!! Dean can't slice off a few vamp heads??! I know maybe Samuel hasn't seen this side of Dean (I assume) but I resented the dumbing down of Dean here. Or maybe that it just alienated him even more from the Sam and Samuel camp. Made it feel very us and... Dean. *sniff* Stop doing that. Please.

I ranted. I'm sorry. But that hurt. Last week's episode made me complacent I suppose. Made me think that show remembered how to deliver a mighty fine episode. And maybe it was awesome. Maybe my emotional attached has clouded my judgement. Or maybe the sheer fact that I was SO emotionally wrapped up in it meant it was, in fact, an amazing episode.

Was it? I couldn't see through the tears...

Comments

[smilla02.livejournal.com]

Aww, honey. I'm sure we're headed toward a big, big reveal with Sam. *hugs*

The entire dream (or it was a vision?) sequence was beautiful and creepy with the two little girls. I was so hearbroken and hurty at this episode that I didn't mention it at all.

I didn't see Dean dumbed down to be honest (and I'm very sensitive to that). I saw Dean resisiting his craving in a lair frull of human blood and vampires and killing many. Samuel just doesn't know this side of Dean.

I'm crossing my fingers that the mystery of Sam is enlightened soon. I'm not expecting a solution, obviously, but some more clues.

[ash48.livejournal.com]

I'm sure we're headed toward a big, big reveal with Sam

I know. And I do know that but... argh... I'm feeling so impatient right now. To be honest I didn't actually think they were going to make Sam soooo wrong. In some ways I'm glad they've had the balls to do that (yay show!) but it still hurts and I really just don't want another 5 episode like that. I reckon it will be about 2 more.. maybe even the next one. I'm completely unspoiled so I suppose I'll have to wait and see.

I didn't see Dean dumbed down to be honest (and I'm very sensitive to that)

I'm glad. I just. Dean was so alone facing the enemy this time. He did so well and then to be met with that. But I agree, more about Samuel then Dean. Dean is such a god damn hero.

I'm not expecting a solution, obviously, but some more clues.

Argh! I want resolution!!... which is crazy only 6 episodes in.... *g*

*breathes* I'm good now... *hugs*